The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
