I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
