what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize