Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
