Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
