Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
