ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Randomize
