i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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