im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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