yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
