is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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