worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
two words: eviction party
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
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