I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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