found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize