Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
