girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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