also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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