Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
