You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I just found a bag of teeth...
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
