I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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