yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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