ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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