Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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