That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Randomize
