Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize