i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
