So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
