well you can't waste a boner
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I need to sanitize my soul.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
