Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
