break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
