I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
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