wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
