did you get engaged???
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
