Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
