1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize