Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
