Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Randomize
