His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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