Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
