sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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