I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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