k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Farmville is her only friend.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
