How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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