It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
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