Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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