He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
