No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
