quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
