I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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