Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
