I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
